From #MeToo till #BeTheChange

STORY 1 

Sakshi donned the red dupatta which her brother had gifted her on rakhi. She placed her dupatta covering her breasts thus adding another cover and left for college.

Ira was so excited to wear the little black dress which her mother had bought for the fresher’s party. She admired her long legs in the mirror and left for college.

Sakshi and Ira crossed paths in the lifts exchanged a couple of words and left for different directions.

A man brushed past Sakshi turned, faced her and asked Chalti hain kya Randi? Losing her mind and strength she crumpled on the ground clutching the dupatta and cried hopelessly.

In the next lane two boys riding a bike abruptly stopped next to Ira. They got down and said Would you like us to remove that little piece of cloth you have on yourself so we can admire you completely?

Ira’s mind went blank and she crumpled on the ground tears flowing relentlessly through her eyes. One of the boy tried to touch her but something slammed across his face and hearing that noise Ira looked up to see Sakshi banging her bag on the boy’s face. The boys sat on their bike and sped away.

Sakshi sat down hugging Ira. Ira hugged her back and said Thank You Sakshi, I shouldn’t have worn this dress and walked on the street. Sakshi wiped Ira’s tears, held her shoulders, looked her in the eye and said don’t do you dare blame yourself for a moment. Look at me not even an inch of my skin is seen and yet a man called me a Randi and asked me to come with him. Ira looked at Sakshi, wiped her tears and hugged her for a long time.

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I love wearing one pieces and jeans more than salwar suits because I feel comfortable in them. If that makes me a Randi or easily available in your mind, remember then that if anything needs to be torn off or needs a makeover is your dirty brain. And if you come at me I’ll tear you to shreds. 

I think there should be therapists to change the mindset of such people who look at women and see nothing except a piece of ass to bang. We should hang a placard in their necks saying I HARASS WOMEN, I AM SICK so that the society actually knows these FUCKTARDS and we have a system to filter them which is much better than how they filter us based on clothes. 

Just because a women wears revealing clothes she is a slut and she sleeps with everyone. If that was the case why didn’t Ira go with those boys? Why did she cry? And why did that man called Sakshi a whore? If clothes determine a Woman’s character then Sakshi wasn’t wearing any revealing outfit, so why? 

WHY- Because some men feel entitled to sleep with any woman they want. They feel the sole purpose a woman has in life is to submit to me. They feel is a woman wears short clothes she becomes a whore, who can be touched and hit on by anyone at any time. But trust me the problem is not with clothes it’s with the mindset of these men as even if they see a woman in Salwars/Sarees they will sexually harass/assault them. They don’t differentiate Sakshi’s and Ira’s they just look at them as objects made for their fun and enjoyment. Shame on them and shame on this society who nurtures them and shame the poor woman who has suffered such a terrible ordeal. 

I think these people are sick and they need our help so let’s help them if we see them in the road harassing others by being witnesses and reporting the crime to cops.

 

STORY 2 

Sarah married her childhood sweetheart. She got along well with his parents and that is what her excited her more about this marriage that now she would have two sets of parents. The next day after her wedding she woke up and decided to surprise her in laws and her husband with a huge spread for breakfast including all of their favourite items. She cooked and cooked not realising she was all sweaty and gross as food played Splash Em with her. But when she set the table and filled the coffee pot she smiled as she imagined her in laws and husband’s reaction as they would wake up to the waft of their favourite delicacies and the warm smile on their faces as they dug in.

Everyone came out and saw a lavish spread on the table. Sarah was cleaning the kitchen counter when she heard her husband call out to her. She walked out in the dining room smiling. He took one look at her and said Sar what are you wearing? Just go change and wear a Kurta or a Saree, my parents won’t appreciate you wearing a night dress. Just then Sarah’s in laws came out and inquired about what was happening.

Sarah told them everything how she made breakfast to surprise them and how her husband told her about their dislikes towards western clothes. Mom Dad I know you’ll since I am a baby and I have come in this house so many times even wearing hot pants, why dint you tell me then, she asked them?

Sarah’s mother-in-law smiled sauntering forward and said but Beta you weren’t married to our son then. You are our daughter-in-law now and what you do speaks for our entire family. We can’t allow people to call you names because of your inappropriate clothing and neither we can allow them to point fingers at us.

Sarah smiled and said I called you Mom and Dad because I thought marriage gave me another set of parents to be responsible towards and to love. If my clothes were really determined who I was and if you really loved me why didn’t you tell me this before? You know me since my birth, you knew your son is the only man I loved and would eventually marry, then why didn’t you consider me as your daughter as if this was a bad habit why dint you tell me to get rid off it before?

The smile fell off her mother in law’s face and she couldn’t give any answer to Sarah.

Mom my Maa always loved me for who I was. While growing up she taught me to love everyone, be compassionate and kind, she told me to never hurt or harm anyone. These were the values I grew up with and never once did she mention that I will be a bad person or people will judge me or them over my clothes. My mother is a wonderful human being and I don’t think she would teach me anything wrong, but I love you like I love her and if you feel that I am wrong then I will change and adapt just for you. But just tell me one thing will you tell the same thing to Didi as well? You love Didi for who she is then why not me?

Sarah’s mother in law had tears in her eyes and she hugged Sarah and said, I don’t care what you wear as I was wearing a mask over my eyes which was harmful and you helped me get it off. Western clothes or Indian Clothes you have a heart of gold and it will always shine and that is the kind of person I need my son to be around.

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If you want your daughter in law to treat you like her parents then make sure you accept and love her like you would your own daughter. 

 

STORY 3 

Ashima checked her watch and realised it was way past 1:30 so she called herself a cab and told her friends that she had to go home. A couple of drinks later she had started feeling groggy. She went out of the restaurant and was resting her head on the wall when two hands grabbed her. She opened her eyes in shock to see a man pushing himself against her. With all her strength she started pushing him away. To her shock he said you smell of booze and you are all alone here weren’t you looking for sex.

She successfully pushed him away and yelled what is wrong with you. You go in a fancy restaurant like that, you look like a decent person and you think in this way? He smiled a very creepy smile and pushed her against the wall one more time and this time no matter how much she pushed, fought back and screamed nothing could stop the horrific act which was happening with her.

In her mind she thought that if I hadn’t gotten drunk probably I wouldn’t be in this peril. Every time he pushed himself against her she could hear a piece of her soul shattering. After he had had his fun he threw her next to the dumpster and simply left without even glancing at her. After what felt like ages she was able to get up. She decided to go and report what had happened to her. A couple of questions from the cops which made her go into the details of the traumatising act and dirty glances from them for her despite being a lady and getting drunk she left for her house.

After scrubbing herself to the point of bleeding to death she still couldn’t let go off the thought that had she not been drunk this wouldn’t have happened to her. Days turned into weeks which turned into months. People started looking at her with disgusting glances and stares, they judged her for staying late out of the house and drinking, many even told her to take her complain back as it would get her nothing except misery. Ashima did nothing of that sort and decided to fight for justice.

A year later she was still fighting but hadn’t forgiven herself for getting drunk and staying out late. She opened the newspaper and what she read horrified her to an extent which she thought was not possible as every bad feeling which existed in this world had washed her on that horrible night but this piece of news shattered and pierced her soul even more than it had done that night. A 3 year old girl was raped by a 50 year old man. The news said that the man was their neighbour and under the pretext of playing with her he raped her.

Ashima slid from the sofa to the floor and started crying and asked herself what could have that small girl done as she was within the safety of her own house? She had followed all the rules,stayed at home, hadn’t partied,hadn’t done any drugs, she simply had done nothing.She found renewed strength cursing the man to the fiery pit of Hades. This incident had given her like a bolt in her hand which told her to make sure to right the wrong done to her. Because today truly she found out that no matter what she would/wouldn’t have done that horrific night would have happened as the reason it had happened was not her but the man. With a heavy heart she closed the newspaper but a weight lifted off her chest as she finally was able to forgive herself as she held herself no longer responsible for what was done to her.

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Rape in all situations is wrong. No man should force himself upon a Woman under any circumstance or any relation. A woman who was raped goes through hell and the society blames her for what has happened to her. Instead of standing by her and putting the man down who did this to her we start degrading the woman. 

Rape can stop only and only when men learn that they don’t have a right to do this to any woman. Just because you go 90 Degrees seeing someone is and will never be an acceptable reason for the horror you committed. Rape is a crime and I hope our society starts grilling the Rapist more than the Victim otherwise soon the Victim will have to be her own Kali and Durga and get her Justice. 

STORY 4

Priti was ecstatic to see the + on the home pregnancy kit. She took a picture of the strip and shared it via WhatsApp with her husband. He texted her back saying please meet me at 7 pm today near my office.

Priti got dressed in her powder blue dress which her husband adored and hailed a cab to his office. He was standing near the pavement, expecting to be hugged or swept off her feet all Priti got was a signal to come and sit in the car. Still she looked up smiling and saw a mask of tension on her husband’s face. She asked him if everything was okay and his words through that composed mask shook her completely. Yes everything is okay my darling just taking you to a doctor friend of mine to check if we are having a boy as to be honest I cannot handle having a girl child in the family and nor have I ever wanted one.

She wanted to say a lot of things but apparently her tongue had lost it’s ability to move. The car stopped but her thoughts were still running a relay race. She did not move. When her husband came to her side to check why she wasn’t getting out she told him I do not want to go through with this, I want a child and I want it irrespective of it’s sex. He tried to force her but no matter she wouldn’t budge. She got off the car and took a cab to her parents house.

Priti told her parents everything that had happened. They were horrified at their son-in-law’s behaviour but what they told Priti horrified her even more. Beta this child is already doomed and only you can save it by keeping your pride aside. Call your husband and apologise and go for the test, if it’s a boy keep it, maybe that will help you get your husband’s forgiveness.If it’s a girl get is aborted. It’s not easy being separated from your husband while pregnant. People will make many stories and you won’t be able to raise this child alone. Keeping their hand on her head they left the room.

Priti’s tears had dried up but there was a fire burning her from inside out. She got up and opened the window sucked in some fresh air, took a deep breath and thought no one would allow her to live in peace. She climbed on the ledge and jumped off from the 20th Floor.

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Pregnant ladies go through hell without all this and what do such narcissistic people do they kill them. Yes such deaths are not suicides but you practically guide them to that ledge and push them. The hypocrisy of this society is that they want females to cook,clean,earn and fuck but they don’t want to raise girls. If this continues soon Women will disappear from the face of this earth. Stop killing us as women are essential for the survival of man. 

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These are not the only problems women face. There are more issues apart from this like marital rape, dowry deaths etc which kill a woman while alive. She literally becomes a zombie. Many of us have lived these stories and those who have come out of it and are fighting it I want to tell you’ll that I am really proud of you and all of the sisters who weren’t able to make it I apologise sincerely because I wish I could have done something to help you all. 

If you can see the sufferer in all these stories is a Woman. I don’t have problem with all Men but yes Men who harass Women I hate them but if that makes me a NAZI I don’t care as what these men do to these woman is as bad as what NAZIS did but if you can’t see that there is no point in explaining my point of view to you as you have closed your eyes and ears and are okay with everything that is happening around you. 

When a person is harassed mentally they go through a very tough time and all they need is some support. It really helps to just listen and talk to them as they are so exhausted and tired of being shunned and shamed that one person also can light a spark of hope in them and get them out of their hopeless situation. Be that spark to someone, it’s better than doing all that you do under the name of religion as helping people and being a good human being is what pleases God the most. 

The only remedy to this situation is to be the change .Teach your daughters to fight injustice instead of succumbing to it. Teach them to give a damn about society and do what their gut and intuition tells them. Teach your sons to respect women. Teach your sons to ear a love of a woman than her body. Teach your children equality of sexes. 

Teach your children to be good people that is more important than moulding them in the tray of NORMAL which this stupid society has created. 

You want to see the change then be the change. #TOSEETHECHANGEBETHECHANGE 

 

PS: THIS POST IS NOT INTENDED TO ANNOY/POINT OR HURT ANYONE’S RELIGIOUS FEELINGS AND EGOS. WHATEVER I HAVE WRITTEN IN THIS POST IS WHAT WOMEN LIKE ME AND THOUSANDS OTHERS FACE. IT IS TRUE ACCORDING TO ALL FACTS AND EXPERIENCES I HAVE

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Know Me!!!

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Hello peeps. It’s my first blogversary!!! First I would like to thank all my readers for their unconditional love and support. I really appreciate all of you!

Now since it’s my Blogversary I kept on wondering what I should do today or more like what I should blog about today! So I went on a limb and decided to answer questions about me. I emailed/Whatsapp’d and also put a Facebook status asking people for their questions and I got a lot of questions via Whatsapp so am gonna answer 25 questions in  all.

  1. You are such a happy and exuberant person, what is the secret of that?

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A. This is one of my most favorite question and there are several reasons for my happiness. First I am happy because I believe in living in the present, there are a lot of mistakes in my past too but I learn from them and move on. I don’t allow them to shadow my present and future. Another thing which makes me happy is that I believe a lot, I believe that we are all a part of  a great story happening and everyone is going to get their happy share so why to be sad and glum for all that is temporary as something beautiful waits for you round the corner so take a leap and fly. And lastly keep smiling and never give up!!!

2. Do you believe in God?

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A. YES!!! Firstly when I look around at the trees,the birds,the sky, the sea and of course all of us human beings it’s impossible to believe that one person could create such beauty but in truth that is what happened and a mere human cannot do all of this alone so yes the one who created our beautiful universe is God! Secondly I have experienced God all of those times when I couldn’t pull through and I did because of my faith in him I have actually seen him next to me supporting me,pushing me to get to that safety net and that finishing line. Thirdly all religions and religious scriptures direct us to connect with humanity and that is a principle I live on so if God has said that then of course I believe in him!

3. A cause which is very close to my heart?

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A. There are many causes which are close to my heart but the most closest one is FEMINISM. I feel that it’s a right of every person born on this earth to study, work and more importantly live the way they want to. There should not be any gender bias when it comes to education, pay and work. I would really love to see men and women walk together as equals!

4. My take on fashion?

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A. Fashion is what you feel comfortable in. I never copy anyone’s style, yes I get inspired by celebrities like Emma Watson, Blake Lively and Sonam Kapoor but I never copy them. You should create your own style. When dressing up Comfort is the most important aspect for me!

5. My favorite clothing brand?

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A. Again I am not a brand freak, I will wear anything and everything that appeals me.

6. Which phone I am currently using?

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A. Now the apples which I pay for are not the only ones I eat! iPhone 6!

7. What do I always carry in my bag?

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A. Sunglasses, Wet Wipes/Sanitiser, Keys, Lipstick, Compact, Wallet, Diary and a Pen!

8. My most to-go outfit?

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A. One pieces

9. My take on accessories?

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A. Accessories to clothing are like bullets to a gun.

10. My most favorite make up product?

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A. A red lipstick!!! Currently am crushing on Chanel and Lancome Red Lipsticks!!!

11.Lipstick or Lip Gloss?

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A. Lipstick but if the gloss gives an effect like a lipstick then I don’t mind it like the Chanel Rouge Allure Gloss(19 Pirate) which I am currently crushing on <3<3 !

12. How many lipsticks do I own?

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A. 26 and out of them 21 are red!

13.  Favorite Perfume?

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A. Tresor Midnight Rose by Lancome and Touch by Burberry!

14. Which brand lipsticks do I own?

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A. Chanel, Lancome, Bobbi Brown,Nars, Mac, Lakme, Maybelline, Loreal, Revlon, Oriflame and Colourbar

15. Favorite Accessory?

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A. Earrings, they can make even the most boring outfit alluring! Right now I am crushing on my Kendall Jenner Coin Earrings, they go well both with Indian and Western Outfits!

16. Favorite Song?

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A. I like any music that makes me cheerful or inspires me. Currently am listening to Let It Go (Idina Menzel) and Hunger (Ross Copperman) on a loop. If I have to pick one all time favorite then that would be Nothing’s Gonna Change my Love for You!

17. 5 Favorite Books?

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A. Harry Potter Series, The Fault In Our Stars by John Green, Lone Eagle by Danielle Steel, The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho and Rage of Angels by Sidney Sheldon.

18. Mention 5 things from your bucket list

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A. There are a lot of things which I want to do but my most first important thing is That I wanna live my life happily, I want to spend a Christmas in New York, Skydive, Write a novel and Go to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter(WWOHP)

19. My current relationship status?

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A. I am in a serious relationship .He is the most wonderful guy I have ever met. He loves me a lot and respects me. These are the only details I wish to share for now as when you are in a relationship it’s not just about you it’s about the other person as well. Soon I will be publicly announcing about it 🙂

20. When were you heartbroken the most?

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A. I have been truly heartbroken only twice. First when my grandfather died. Second time I was heartbroken and felt stabbed when certain people made my relationship with my ex their ego issue and it put a terrible strain on me and my relationship. I never thought the ones I love will hurt me so much but they did. Any way I am going to take that also as a learning experience and now I know who my true allies are 🙂 .

21. Whom do I love the most?

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A. I love all of my friends and some of my relatives too 😉 but the people I love most are Virat Kohli, My Parents, My Sister and Arinjai ❤ !

22. Why do I love Virat Kohli?

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A. This was the most interesting question. Have you ever questioned why you love your parents? No you haven’t, same is my case. I cannot question why I love him, it’s natural for me it goes with living life. I myself don’t know when,how and why I fell in love with him. It’s a very huge and important part of my life.It’s like his love is tattooed on my heart. He is the reason I wake up in the morning and falling in love with him is the best thing that has ever happened to me.

23. You say you love Virat so much would you throw yourself in front of a bus to save him?

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A. YES,YES & A 1000 TIMES YES. I would throw myself in front of a bus, walk on coals, give that floating plank in a sea, pitch myself off a tower to save Virat Kohli! And this is not just because of the love I feel for him it’s because I am selfish and my entire world revolves around him, there is no world for me if there is no Virat in that world and so for my existence Virat needs to exist too!

24. Where did I learn Tarot from?

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A. I did not learn Tarot from any teacher or classes. My friend gifted me an Oracle Deck and we started doing it together as we were Indigo Children we quickly learnt the art ourselves!

25. What do I love most about life?

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A. I love life itself and yes of course VIRAT KOHLI too!!!

I had so much fun writing this blog. I hope you enjoy reading it too. For those whose questions were not included I am personally gonna email you the answer of those questions.

Thank you for so much overwhelming response and I really and truly appreciate all of you.

Take Care

Keep Shining and Loving!!!